
If you yelled for 8 years, 7 months and 6 days, you would have produced
enough sound energy to heat one cup of coffee. (Hardly seems worth it!)
A pig's orgasm lasts for 30 minutes. (In my next life I want to be a pig!)
Banging your head against a wall uses 150 calories an hour. (Still not
over that pig thing!)
Humans and dolphins are the only species that have sex for pleasure. Is
that why Flipper was always smiling? (Why isn't the pig included in this
list?)
The strongest muscle in the body is the tongue. (Hmmmmm...)
A crocodile cannot stick its tongue out.
The ant can lift 50 times its own weight, can pull 30 times its own weight
and always falls over on its right side when intoxicated. (From drinking
little bottles of...?) (Did the gov't pay for this research??)
Polar bears are left handed. (Who knew...? Who cares!)
The flea can jump 350 times its body length. It's like a human jumping the
length of a football field.
A cockroach will live nine days without it's head, before it starves to
death.
The male praying mantis cannot copulate while its head is attached to its
body. The female initiates sex by ripping the male's head off. ("Honey,
I'm home. What the...")
Some lions mate over 50 times a day. (In my next life I still want to be a
pig...quality over quantity!)
Butterflies taste with their feet. (Oh, jeez!)
Elephants are the only animals that can't jump.
An ostrich's eye is bigger than it's brain. (I know some people like
that.)
Starfish don't have brains. (I know some people like that too!)
Remember, when someone annoys you, it takes 42 muscles in your face to
frown. BUT, it only takes 4 muscles to extend your arm and smack the
asshole in the head.
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