Rugby Accident.

This is taken from the latest edition of FHM:

When I was studying in Ireland, I took up rugby. As my first season
wore on, the lads and I were eventually scheduled to play a team which
had a reputation for violent play.

Considering that we weren't the most talented outfit to have ever taken the field we decided to accept the challenge with a "do or die" attitude, hoping things would eventually swing our way.

They didn't and to make matters worse our star player dislocated his hip after a particularly ferocious tackle.

He was clearly in a lot of pain so we all stood back to which the medic who, in one swift movement, managed to slot the hip back into its socket.

Then Alan began a long blood curdling scream . To our horror, we realised that one of his testicles had also been jammed into the socket and was now firmly held in the place by the hip.

Incidentally, Alan managed to rip a vocal chord with his screaming.