Tastes Tell

Seven New York City bartenders were asked if they could nail a woman's personality based on what she drinks. Though interviewed separately, they concurred on almost all counts. The results:

Drink: Beer
Personality: Casual, low-maintenance; down to earth.
Your Approach: Challenge her to a game of pool.

Drink: Blender Drinks
Personality: Flaky, whiny, annoying; a pain in the buttocks.
Your Approach: Avoid her, unless you want to be her cabin boy.

Drink: Mixed Drinks
Personality: Older, more refined, high maintenance, has very picky tastes; knows exactly what she wants.
Your Approach: You won't have to approach her, if she is interested, she'll send YOU a drink.

Drink: Wine - (does not include White Zinfandel, see below)
Personality: Conservative and classy; sophisticated yet giggles.
Your Approach: Tell her you love to travel and spend quiet evenings with friends.

Drink: White Zinfandel
Personality: Easy; thinks she is classy and sophisticated, actually has no clue.
Your approach: Make her feel smarter than she is ... this should be an easy target.

Drink: Shots
Personality: Likes to hang with frat-boy pals and looking to get totally drunk ... and naked.
Your Approach: Easiest hit in the joint. You have been blessed this evening. Nothing to do but wait. However, be careful not to make her mad!

****

Then there is the MALE addendum. The deal with guys is simple and clear cut:

Drink: Domestic Beer
He's poor and wants to get laid.

Drink: Imported Beer
He likes good beer and wants to get laid.

Drink: Wine:
He's hoping that wine will give him a sophisticated image to help him get laid.

Drink: Whiskey
He doesn't give a hoot about anything but getting laid.

Drink: Tequila:
He is thinking he has a chance with the toothless waitress.

Drink: White Zinfandel:
He's gay.